Working Backwards

So where have I been? Certainly not online. My family and I have traveled along the edges of the country in the past few months, yet I have not written about our adventures here. Why not?

This is the question I ask myself as I sit down to get this blog and this budgeting project back underway.

I see now that the urge to get our home finances in order may have had roots in deeper places than, even, financial freedom. I think it might have been rooted in some personal things that have nothing to do with money: reaching “adulthood”, cultivating responsibility, acting from my will, having the courage of my convictions, overcoming fears, and, finally but perhaps most importantly, integrating my adult financial life with my husband’s adult financial life (which, given that we married in our forties, has some complexities).

Somewhere along the way, March or April, I began to realize that all the little steps forward I was making and writing about were illusionary. They were not really moving my project closer to my overall goals. Yet I couldn’t figure out, or was in denial about, what was keeping me from making progress. With some thought, and time, I now realize that I ran away from doing the hard work required to make leaps instead of small steps. But, more importantly, I understand that I hadn’t considered the need to work backwards before I started moving forward.

When my sister and I started this project, I gave only a passing thought to those deep-rooted issues I listed above. Those very character issues led me into my loosey goosey financial situation in the first place. Can I simply follow a financial formula to get me past them? Maybe. Yet, how did I expect to just start keeping copious, accurate financial records without a tool and a designated time or method of doing so? How could I fully integrate my financial life with my husband’s if we didn’t take time to strategize how to do it? Not even 10 minutes worth of time? How could I hope to maintain the courage of my convictions if my husband and I weren’t on the same page?

My plan to move forward involves addressing these lacks — because I will move forward, however slowly.

I’ve decided instead of giving up — or just going to therapy — I’m going to face fears, of financial shortcomings, of character flaws. I will try again to get my financial life in order and build on the small steps I have made, such as creating a joint bank account, tracking expenditures and creating a needs/wants/savings balance sheet.

The first nine months of this project haven’t been a complete wash. I have learned that when it comes to personal finances, numbers are not the only things that matter. Gone are my delusions I’d have my financial life in order in 12 months. Ha! Silly me.

To really move forward, I now realize I need to incorporate other aspects of my life into this spreadsheet, as well. Blood, sweat and tears are involved and I must go there. All the way there, by first working backwards. Two steps back – three steps forward.

That is my plan.

 

 

March Madness

Frugal February has given way to March Madness. I’m just going to come out and admit it. I was feeling flush after February. Free haircut, free date night concert of violinist Joshua Bell (!), super efficient grocery shopping and use of food resources all gave way to a few weeks of “whatever.” A few dinners out, a spring break overnight to Disney World (with Florida resident discounts, but still not cheap), new bathing suits, a few shirts for mom, etc.

Clara mugs with Winnie-the-Pooh in Disney’s Animal Kingdom.

So while I build my bamboo fence and try to reign in the spending, I’ve decided to look closer to home for inexpensive fun. Certainly Disney is fun, Continue reading

With a whim and bamboo

Our house is close to a street on which people run, walk dogs and ride bikes. We are clearing an area on the west side so we can plant one of our potted citrus trees. Opening up the space has given our dog a view of an active intersection:Simmy is a sighthound who, when he is not playing dress-up, loves to be outside in the garden. Since he can’t chase what he sees at a distance, he barks his fool head off at anyone passing by. His job of announcing all the neighborhood comings and goings is stressing him out, and wearing thin my patience. He simply doesn’t need to bark so much. A visual screen blocking a view of distant dogwalkers will help solve the problem, I think, but a privacy fence is not allowed in our historic neighborhood. I turn, happily, to a large clump of bamboo growing in our yard: I need it to build my fence, and it is badly in need of trimming and thinning.

I do *heart* bamboo. So much so that I want to surround myself with it. It grows fast and free in Florida. The strong, lightweight plant is so versatile it has been put to use around the world as piping, scaffolding, flooring, exterior walls, curtain rods, clothing, utensils, and, of course, fencing. On my first trip to Hawaii I fell in love with the grasses’ tall green culms as I scrambled through a grove growing high on a mountainside. It grows in many forms across the U.S., and in sunny Florida it is possible to grow many of the larger varieties. We have four or five types. (Our neighbor planted the impressive timber variety, and I welcome its potential to spread into our yard.):

(For size: the ends of smaller canes I'm using are visible in the photo's lower right corner.)

The prolific grass grows so fast that hyperbole is not even required to describe its pace:  You can practically watch the grass grow. Which just means you’ll be able to cut it down and turn it into a fence that much sooner.

I searched the interwebs for info on how to build a bamboo fence and found little to guide me other than this article. I know there are books on the subject, but I didn’t want to research too much. I wanted to dive right in. This is how I roll.

The poles, which I harvest manually with a bear claw saw, are perfect for creating a fence made entirely out of items from my yard. The branches of Sabal palm leaves, wedged into the crotches of cherry laurels and secured with cable ties, make the cross beams: 

I learned how to pick which poles to cut (at least three years old). I gleaned it is important while making a fence “post” to trim the pole to height just above the node. That way the pole will not fill with rainwater and rot. I also learned there is a traditional black twine Japanese artisans use to fasten bamboo fence poles to cross beams. So I bought classy black cable ties to imitate this effect.

The fence is not finished yet. Cutting and trimming the poles is time consuming. I’ve been tied up with a sick child home from school, out-of-town visitors, and following up on some of the tasks required to get my must haves under control. Next Friday I hope to complete the panels on the west side of our property.

Then I’ll get to be more decorative and artistic with the panels on the north side’s temporary screen, which I began to build by incorporating potted plants and some metal poles I found in the garage. This screen looks silly at the moment because it is nothing more than the sketch of an idea of a fence. 

You, dear readers, (and my husband) will have to trust me when I say that when it is finished the fence will beautifully contain my daughter as well as calm my dog — all without having to deal with city codes. I will also be able to remove it in a hurry, if required.The total price of this natural wonder, excluding time, is about $20 for cable ties.

As we wind down Frugal February, that sounds just about right to me.

 

Free!

So completely fitting with Freakishly Frugal February, er, or Fabulously Frugal February, I got a free salon haircut!

One benefit, as a person of my demographic, to living in a town much smaller than LA is the improved chances that the person you happen to meet is a local business owner. As luck would have it, one woman I ran into the other night just happens to co-own a hair salon.

Every now and then the owners of La Di Da Salon hire new stylists. As part of the policy in this Aveda salon, the owners require their new hires to progress through a series of basic hairstyles to establish competency. So when I ran into Diana and she asked if I’d like a free haircut I said, “heck, yeah!”

The cuts at this salon start at $50. I’m very happy with the cut, and definitely happy with the price. My experience begs the question, do salons near you have similar training programs?

 

 

Learning to Sew and Make and Do

A few years ago my husband gave me a sewing machine for Christmas. A complete surprise to me, it was both a fabulous and a threatening gift.

“Now I can make anything!” was my first thought, quickly followed by, “but I don’t know how to make anything!”

Sure, I made a duffle bag in home economics class in 8th grade. Clearly, that was many years ago, since I suspect home economics hasn’t been offered in grade school for about 30 years.

Alas, the machine sat unused as I focused all my energy on a newborn. About a year later, with a one-year-old daughter, I finally took a community education sewing class offered at the nearby university. As I learned the ins and outs of the sewing machine, I was excited by its abilities and how easy it was to sew basic items. In the class I made a pillowcase for a throw pillow from an old men’s shirt. Armed with some false confidence, I proceeded to plan to make more things. Just what those things were to be I didn’t yet know. The pillowcase sat unused. Another year or two passed and, as of yesterday, I’d done nothing more than hem a few pairs of pants with the machine. I felt a bit defeated; time for a confidence boost, and another class.

This time I decided I was going to make something I would use from something of little use. The pillowcase dress making class, which cost $35, seemed a perfect candidate. My daughter Clara looks cute in just about anything, so how could I go wrong? Inadvertently, I upped the difficulty level with my choice of “fabric” — I brought one of my mom’s old flowing, gathered Laura Ashley skirts to repurpose into a simple girl’s dress. Other expenses included bias tape and some thread – about $6.

I gained a true appreciation for how much preparation goes into a sewing project, as well as the number of techniques there are to master. Finishing seams, using the zigzag stitch, using fractions while calculating seam allowances, planning the process of turning a skirt into a dress – let alone measuring, cutting, pinning and, heck, even ironing – was tough. Oh, and sewing a straight, clean line wasn’t easy either. Given my initial fear of the machine, I might have found the need to learn all of these new skills daunting, but for some reason it felt (and feels) exhilarating. Fun. Playful. Expressive.

I’m pretty gleeful about the simple dress I made for my daughter. I’m going to make more. And I’m going to learn in the process. I’m going to become more confident. Talented. I’m excited. I don’t know why I have been afraid of that machine for so long. Sew. Make. Do. — the name of the business where I made my first dress — is a smart moniker that really sums up the empowering feeling one can get from the act of creating.

I find it inspiring to make clothes and toys for Clara. She is going to be my muse. Eventually maybe I’ll become brave enough to make clothes for myself.